Communication….

I have consistently experienced some communication challenge since my return from the US and started working in Singapore. Yes, I am the common factor in all of these episodes. The other common factor I noticed is the thinking patterns of those who have a problem communicating with me. [There are many others with whom I have great communication and connect well.]

I am not writing to point the finger at others but rather to myself that I need to remember that not everyone can or want to communicate the way I think it should be.

I am also clear it is not because of US but rather my personality even before I left for the US. I am a digital speaker and listener as opposed to analogue speaker and listener. I impose expectations on others, in the context of business arena, to be exact in their communication. [for social context, I do not have such expectations].

I believe strongly that one should say what they mean and mean what they say and I also hold people accountable to the words they say.

Perhaps, all too often, I get too merciless when holding people accountable to statements they made while discussing work. I find myself easily upset [the fluctuating hormones do not help] when I have to repeat myself on the same point more than 3 x. I gladly repeat for someone who is trying to listen and understand. But my agitation gets very high when I find myself talking to someone who is either not ‘there’, not interested or not listening, and in the process requiring me to repeat a request more than 3x, that I find unacceptable. I interpret that as an insult or being disrespectful.

What ensures is my reaction to the ‘disrespect’ while the other party reacts to my reaction [not knowing the cause of it all].

You can picture the rest.

I am convinced that there are some gems to be learnt from such unpleasant encounters. I am scribbling them down and hope to create a little booklet of what I have observed as unhealthy patterns in communication [more Singapore context, I think].