Have you seen how children respond when they are allowed to make choices without any consequence and contrast that behaviour when choices come with consequence?
Most parents have and some Aunties have too [myself included].
I think most parents would agree it can be quite comical. Go ahead and laugh but please don’t just laugh and not consider the implications. Let’s me share some examples.
If we let 2-year olds choose what to wear [with no constraints, no consequence], some of them might prefer to wear nothing, especially after a bath.
Or, if we allow 4-year olds to choose when they want to go to bed [with no limits on entertainment or food], some of them might keep us up all night.
To allow a child to make decisions [choosing] when they do not understand the implications of their decisions and when they do not have to face the consequence of their decisions, we will have the following:
- undesirable eating habits
- inappropriate timing
- missed appointments
- tension between parents
- budget-on-the-run
- ‘me, me and me’ focus; lack of courtesy and respect
- a trail of mindset patterns left for teachers, bosses / supervisors / co-workers to address
It is not easy to balance the needs. To what degree would you allow your children the freedom to choose, even though you know they are doing something silly like giving all your money away to a stranger?
Children need boundaries, they need to know consequences even at very young age and then they will grow up and mature with deep sense of responsibility.
Not too different from the freedom God gave humankind. God gives us human being choices, we are even free to reject our Creator. He has set the boundaries and He lets us know the consequences. We are free to choose but we must face the consequences of our choice – we cannot escape the consequences.
But when we blatantly, defiantly choose to be isolationist, ideologist, cultish, practice witchcraft, etc., believing in the freedom from consequence, we will soon be rudely awaken.
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